what will come of this

I have been going through so many thoughts lately. If you are a woman reading this you know what I'm talking about. within just one minute i can think of things that happened 5 years ago that leads me to thinking about 3 days ago which gets me thinking of 10 years from now. So what do i do with all this mental vomit? i hoard it. yup. and then it eats at my brain, like The Walking Dead (which i cant wait for next season) anyways... very graphic i know. my point in all that is that I'm a control freak. its my sinful nature. i want to control my own thoughts and cling tight to them instead of letting go and giving everything i am worried about to Jesus. why do we do that? we act like we enjoy the bondage but really we don't! Its like in the movie PS I Love You when Harry connick jr asks hilary swank "what do women want" and she says "we have no idea what we want" which is true. but you know what else is more mind blowing...we know what we need and that is to be rescued. rescued from our thoughts and worries that hold us captive, rescued from the daily hum-drum, rescued from the lies that Satan and the world trap us in...we need Jesus. i have always been told that i am an open person and that i wear my heart on my sleeve. i do. the good Lord made my heart transparent. you can tell by just looking at me when I'm sad or joyful. honestly i really like that about me because i think it makes people more comfortable to talk about their life with me. that little snippit leads into something I'm going to share. a few weeks ago i fell into this type of depression. I've been longing for something so long and i see it happening to everyone else and i believed Satan's lies in him telling me that i need what everyone else was having in order for me to be happy. so not true. although my desire for this "thing" isn't a bad desire at all. its actually biblically good. i was putting it at the fore-front though. making it more important than anything and anyone else. i made it my idle. so- step 1. delete facebook off my iPhone. for one week i went without looking at FB. ::big inhale:: ::big exhale:: wow. i highly recommend it. just one week help me to get rid of the lies i was filling myself with and focus on what is true. I'm not saying the lies are gone because they will always be with me [Romans 7:21-25] but its training my heart and mind to think  correctly [Romans 12:2]. God is good. His will is Good. you aren't alone in your struggles. Satan will tell you to keep it to yourself because "who wants to hear about your sad little story" uh-uh not cool. ignore him. listen to Jesus. surround yourself with friends...I've learned that in surrounding myself with people that know me well and love me remind of God's love and faithfulness. i have amazing friends. i love my friends. go be with people who love you! I'm always learning. God is still teaching me. so what will come of all this? ... Only His Goodness.